Naked Curry
by seamusog
Summary: Genfic. Gisela is running around naked in the leaves. Yuuri, Wolfram, Conrad and Josak indulge in repartee and are generally unhelpful. Written for kkm challenge; the challenge was to write a story completely in dialogue.


**Disclaimer:** Author does not own KKM nor did she make moolah off of this story  
**Author's Note:** Not too sure how this turned out, but it is 100% dialogue. Whew! Written for **kkm_challenge**, prompt: Dialogue, Sick, Tapestry, Curry, Fall  
**Summary:** Inspired by **teef_chan**'s entry - a drawing of a naked Gisela playing in the leaves. There's gotta be a reason why Gisela was naked in the leaves.

* * *

**Naked Curry**

"Don't you think Gisela-san would get cold wearing nothing but leaves?"

"Quit staring, you cheater!"

"How can you tell me to quit staring when you yourself are doing it!"

"I'm not staring! I was just checking to make sure she's not hurting herself, it's just... it's just I've never seen her act like that before. It's so unlike her. Gisela doesn't go prancing around naked, running about the courtyard and jumping into big piles of leaves. She's more dignified than that. To think, that could have been me after eating Mother Jennifer's curry."

"Yeah, you're right. Günter would be the one to go prancing."

"Speaking of whom, Your Majesty, there's Günter over there now with his long cloak trying to catch Gisela, perhaps I should assist him."

"But will you be alright Conrad? You still seem dizzy from that injection she shot on your leg."

"I think the effects are wearing off."

"Seeing as you can't stand without my help, Captain, I doubt you'd be running after any nubile young demons anytime soon."

"I'm sure I'll be alright in a couple of minutes, Josak. In the meantime, why don't you put me down and go assist Lord von Kleist."

"I'd love to, but as he threatened to gouge my eyes, boil and use them in a demonic recipe to curse my soul and send it to everlasting torture should I take even one small glance at his naked daughter-- I've seen him boil little kitties before I don't think he'll forgive this humble spy-- so I thought it best to stare at the floor until this blows over. It's really hard to catch anything taller than a worm when you're running with your head bent down."

"Huh, I thought the super-spy Josak Gurrier could catch an invisible man blindfolded in the dark."

"It's not that, young master. If Lord von Kleist could condemn my soul for a peek at Gisela's skin, what do you think he would do when I catch her and got these lowly commoners' hands on that skin?"

"Good point."

"I still can't believe Shin Makoku's best swordsman got defeated by a needle wielded by a sick girl."

"Ah, Wolf, that's unfair. Conrad was just trying to protect me. It's not as if we knew she would be flying out of that tapestry with poisoned needles."

"No, he's right, Your Majesty, I should be have been more prepared. Being the king's guard, I should expect the unexpected."

"Captain, if you expect the unexpected, wouldn't that make it expected?"

"See, Yuuri, Conrart agrees with my assessment. You need to listen to me more often and pay closer attention."

"If you're so wise, why don't you do more than just stand there."

"What? D-didn't you hear Gisela?"

"You're afraid of her?"

"I'm not afraid of her! I'm just-- I'm just being courteous. As a gentleman, I am beholden to a noble lady's request. Especially as that lady is the future Kleist ruler."

"Ah, is that so?"

"Are you doubting my word? Besides, Yuuri, you're the one to talk; this is all your fault."

"Hey, how was I suppose to know she's allergic to curry. You and Conrad and Gwendal ate my mom's curry with no side effect. I thought any demon would be able to eat it. How was I suppose to know it would affect other demons negatively? And how was I suppose to know that running around with no clothes on and jumping into giant piles of leaves is the usual demons' allergic reaction. Humans only sneeze and have red, irritated eyes.... Wait a minute, come spring do you all run around naked like that? Because if you do, I might just stay on Earth during allergy season."

"If you paid attention to Günter's lessons, you would know that what you call allergies have been cured thousands of years ago."

"While this is true, Wolfram, we do know not all Earth spices are present here in our world. Even the best healers cannot come up with a cure for diseases that do not exist. I mean, I myself did some crazy stuff back in New York, perhaps I was allergic to something I ate over there."

"What, you Conrad? I can't imagine it."

"Oh, Captain was pretty wild back then. Allergy or no allergy."

"Really?"

"Well, there was this one time-"

"Ahem."

"Maybe, I'll tell you another day. Besides, it sounds like they're heading this way. You know, this stone floor is pretty interesting when you stare at it for a long time."

"Weeeeeeeeeee!!!!"

"AVERT YOUR EYES OR AS SHINOU IS MY WITNESS... Oh Your Majesty! Please forgive me... Aaaahhh, Gisela, stop running! Get back here this instant young lady!"

"...eeeeeeeeeee!!!!"

"I've never seen Günter so protective of someone other than me-- ACK! Wolf...can't...breath..."

"Must your wandering eyes insult the dignity of Bielefelt even in my presence?"

"What...are...you...gasp...gasp...Let...go..."

"Wolfram, please release His Majesty. As you can see, Günter and Gisela are already out of view."

"Grck! Haaaaah-haaaah-haaaah... Geez, Wolfram, why do you have to be so violent all the time."

"Tell me now, Yuuri, I will understand. After all she is the Kleist heir while I am only a former prince."

"What are you talking about??"

"Your Excellency, I doubt His Majesty's interest in the pretty, naked girl runs in the area of marriage."

"Yeah, that's right! Wait what?!"

"What?!"

"Not what he said! Not what he said!"

"Wolfram, Yuuri, just a suggestion, not that I want to get in between your current discussion, but shouldn't we help Günter... Oh no! Is that mother taking her clothes off?"

"...!!!"

"NO! Oh no! Oh Shinou! Oh no! We need to get out of the castle now! Yuuri, where's Greta? We need to get out of here now!"

"Calm down, Wolf..."

"NOW!"

"Why are we running away? Maybe your mother also have allergies, we really need to come up with a cure. A naked pheromone queen can't be good for Blood Pledge Castle. I mean, I'm sure it's good for the soldiers' morale..."

"Your Majesty, Wolfram is right, we should leave now."

"Conrad, you too? Aren't you worried about your mother?"

"Mother can take of herself especially since she's the source of trouble. Come now, let's head this way, it's the shortest way to the stable."

"Josak, you warn Gwendal, I'll grab Greta! Conrart, we'll meet you downstairs."

* * *

"Boy, what a day! I never thought I'd ever say this, but thank goodness for the Poison Lady Anissina."

"I'm just happy I've survived and Greta hasn't been engaged off to some backcountry prince."

"So are you going to tell me why we all had to run away? Didn't you say that something like this happened before?"

"No! Brrr... just the memory of it makes my spine crawl."

"Why?"

"No, I'd rather not remember, thank you very much. I'm going to bed. Perhaps if I hit my head on the wall often enough, this will be nothing more than a pleasant headache. Today has been a nightmare."

"Gwendal?"

"Grmp. Mother is... I'm sure she was- she just- she must have seen Gisela and thought it was fun, running naked in the leaves, I'm sure it was nothing more than that.... Yes, of course, it's nothing more than that.... Excuse me Your Majesty, I've got work to do."

"This late?"

"...grrrr..."

"You're right, you do have work to do. Good night. Conrad?"

"Yes, Your Majesty? Would you like some warm milk before bed?"

"No. I wanted to know why you three brothers, Greta and I had to run off far from the castle."

"Ah that? Well, let's just say that mother was very interested in ensuring her children experienced all the joys of free love. Yes, how about some warm milk. Maybe Gisela has something to help get sound sleep, sleep that's free from nightmares."

"You think she's well enough and the last of the curry has left her system."

"Even if it hasn't, I wouldn't mind getting injected with-- I mean, yes. Between Günter and Anissina, they have more than adequate knowledge and more than enough power to purge it."

"And Lady Celi?"

"Was just being herself. Warm milk?"

"(sigh).... Fine, warm milk it is."


End file.
